Him

Beneath the gentle laugh

and crooked grin

blazed

your untamed eyes

all lust and sin

blood on your blade

bullet in your skin

I knew you weren’t

like other men

~

©justagirllost2

*trying to find the provenance of this photo

When I Love Again

 

 

When I commit to love again …

he will be my best friend,

my confidant,

my confessor who accepts

all of me

 

He will be the one I mesh with,

my missing piece in mind & heart, as I will be his.

 

He will be that one person who I like being around

Naked in every way

without inhibitions

without fear

free to explore every hidden

and forbidden fantasy

A magnet of lust requited.

Lusting a soul mate is always reciprocal

that’s one of the rules.

(He’s also gonna like to walk around naked at 2am

& eat Rocky Road ice cream from the fridge

from the same spoon)

 

He’ll be the one who talks politics and philosophy

He will not see the bad me, only the me who loves him.

When I’m mad & acting crazy,

he’ll kiss my forehead and say things to make me laugh at me

 

He’ll have a Truth and faith inside that cannot be denied

He will make me want to be the better person I should have been

He will be the nobility missing in me

 

He will be Himself, always

A man with a light inside he’s unafraid to hide

A man of courage, more than mine

 

A man of pure soul & pure heart

A man unafraid of the darkness within

A man unafraid to be who his spirit calls him to be

 

A man in love with Love

A man in love with me

A man who needs no others, but me and God, who brought us together

so that we could transform each other into the most perfect expressions of joy and happiness with all whom we love

Our children, our families, our friends all others share in the bounty of this One true Love
~

©justagirllost2

my forever craves

your touch

skin frenzy whispers

your words

balm honeyed dictions

collide blaze high

conflagration

i’m cured ~ i’m cursed

my new affliction

unleashed, i’m real

like a bird i fly

i soar ~ i feel

i’m electric love

in a paradise

of your words, your mind

you reveal my heart

every piece of you

crashes thru my veins

kamikaze lust

rapture calls my name

you’re the living blood

pumping thru my heart

you’re the only soul

my forever craves

~

https://youtu.be/QMP-o8WXSPM

©justagirllost2

*image ~ Ansuya by Keith Drosin

He Is

He loves me with strong, calloused hands.

He pushes aside wisps of hair to gently kiss my forehead.

His way to wordlessly say, “It’s still ok, you grumpy, unloving, selfish girl . I love every bit and piece of you. I still do.  It’s just me and you and WE will always be ok.”

He laughs when I won’t.

He likes music I don’t, he likes mine too, he never has to choose. He’s an Eclectic demigod of tunes.  A firestorm of moods. He can be as crazy, raunchy, crude, irreverent, lewd, uncontrolled, wild and wicked as the music he listens to.

He is undone watching sad movies, the ones where sports heroes die in the arms of a best friend.

He loves books as if they somehow help him breathe. He reads to me the things that touch him most deeply. He hides nothing of what he’s feeling or thinking. He knows I never judge him & though I may disagree I respect him and always try to see though his eyes.

His openness, trust and complete honesty are the greatest gifts of Love anyone has ever given me.  He allows me to reciprocate. His uncaged heart frees me.

Everything about him screams sexy.  His mind is my Aphrodisiac.  His body is my home. There is no part of me he hasn’t seen. There is no place on me he hasn’t touched. My lips, sighs, whispers, cries, passion, pleasure, pain, desire, every inch, outside and in… There is nothing I keep from him. To Him only do I belong.

He can split logs and carry them in rain.  He is made of hardest muscle and beard. He is not soft. I love the rugged length of him. The smell of sweat and skin. The way his hands engulf mine. The way his body shields and protects. He makes me feel strong, yet delicate.

He isn’t afraid to Pray, in his own way.

He seeks beyond this world for the greater good and greater Truth.

He Respects all creatures, all life. He lets butterflies rest upon his thumb and never kills bumblebees or fireflies.

His takes no delight in cruelty or another man’s downfall

He is strength with tenderness. A gentle upheaval. A fascinating contradiction.

He is Bold as knights of old. He Protects the innocent, the weak, the bullied, the meek.

He is slow to anger or take offense. He sees all, the bad, the good in those he calls friend.

He does what is right and honorable with courage and strength of conviction.

He is a man of action, a Warrior

He is a Seeker of peace

Hypocrisy he never tolerates. Ignorance he won’t excuse. He never suffers fools.

He has no need for the approval of men. He’s no sheep to be led by irrational emotion. He’s not influenced by the latest trends among politicians, philosophers or the masses.

He is a realist, a pragmatist who sees with the eyes of wisdom and reason.

He is an Idealist, an optimist, a philosopher.

Compelling, passionate, brilliant and fascinating. He challenges my mind, and he delights when mine challenges his.

He is gentility and class. He is confident and secure with his manhood, his place in the world. He is nobility of thought. Justice and honesty are ingrained in his heart.

More than generous, he seeks no adulation or glory for kindnesses

He sacrifices without complaint for those he loves

He gazes into each sun’s rising and setting with wonder and awe. He knows all nature is a masterpiece, a treasure to protect and respect

He shows me reality in colors unseen

He sees beyond what the eyes perceive

In every season he finds hope, no matter how stark the horizon or chilling the breeze

He teaches me unending ways to discover the Beauty in me

Like a rare flower he treasures and cherishes me with every breath

He delights as I bloom beneath his care. He is never threatened by my strength. He could crush me in an instant, I trust him completely. I am fearless and free within the fortress of him

He is my Protector, my Avenger

He is my Savior, my soulmate, my biggest fan, my most ardent, attentive Lover

He is my best friend

He found me when I was alone, unguarded, unmasked. He SAW into me and still stayed around. I know it’s meant to last

He is Man ~ He is my Love

He walks this earth

My Soul’s Mate known and expected

since before time began

I will wait a lifetime

to walk beside him once again

Hand in Hand

~

 

©justagirllost2

Darkness is a temporary haven

I curled up into my mind

held myself tight

I wrote to the one who hurt me

my thoughts never tongue-tied

I was bold ALL CAPS adamant

about my boundaries to be

Truthful about what I believe

what I want

what I need

Brutally honest

Pure feeling screaming

electricity

thru my words

running free

silently violently

finally

after three messages

finally

I got it

I GOT it

finally

I realized it didn’t matter if the one

I dreaded ever read my messages

finally

I know I need to let go

I know who I am

I know what I deserve and what it means to love

I don’t need to prove I’m right

not anymore

finally I got it

the truth is

God’s the only One who knows my heart

He’s the only One I answer to and for

I realize I never truly want to hurt those I love

I remember finally

I see the beautiful, loving, giving, radiant truth their presence brings

Stepping away into the silence

the darkness of feeling

everything

such a pain, such a peace

I realize this life is a never ending learning how to Be

how to love, how to clearly see

I let the anger, hurt, pain in tears wash over me

I know that I’m not happy living sad

The darkness is my haven

temporarily

until I’m ready to face the warmth of loving and being loved again

That’s where I am meant to live

that’s me

~

©justagirllost2

~

*A favorite song from one of my most favorite groups, Staind. I LOVE all of their music. Their words are soulful, introspective, real, raw and speak to me in so many ways. Past and present. This song is one of my favorites. ❤

https://youtu.be/QCZXjB9DPl4

So Far Away

Lyrics

This is my life
Its not what it was before
All these feelings I’ve shared
And these are my dreams
That I’d never lived before
Somebody shake me
‘Cause I
I must be sleeping

Now that we’re here,
It’s so far away
All the struggle we thought was in vain
All in the mistakes,
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
Now that we’re here it’s so far away
And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed to be the person that I am today

These are my words
That I’ve never said before
I think I’m doing okay
And this is the smile
That I’ve never shown before

Somebody shake me ’cause I
I must be sleeping

Now that we’re here,
It’s so far away
All the struggle we thought was in vain
All in the mistakes,
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
Now that we’re here it’s so far away
And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed to be the person that I am today

I’m so afraid of waking
Please don’t shake me
Afraid of waking
Please don’t shake me

Now that we’re here,
It’s so far away
All the struggle we thought was in vain
All in the mistakes,
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
Now that we’re here it’s so far away
And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed to be the person that I am today