Just a Girl Lost 2

Just a girl lost~ Here I share bits & pieces of me, in poetry, prose, music & posts from writers who inspire me.


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Our Own Eden

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He is the sweetest secret

in my heart

Our own Eden we own

two tethered in thought
never apart

Silk bound by steel

ties our two hearts

With reverence he inks
love notes upon my soul

His words priceless treasure

Within me they’re owned

untarnished like sugared gold

he comes within a rising sun

My body hums
in electric ache
I lie in shadows bold
insatiable
kissed awake
my naked desire
his to sate
his forever flame
I light his way

He is mine

I am his

Irretrievably and
completely bound

In each other

lost and found

~

©justagirllost2

*photo mine


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Christmas to me ūüéĄ

Christmas to me ¬†is always magical. ¬†Even when I’m feeling like a Scrooge.¬†ūüéĄ

Christmas somehow manages to get beneath my skin and throw goodwill and cheer in there with all the rest of forgotten memories.

Like Midnight Mass every year when I was little.  My mom waking me and getting me dressed to attend the most beautiful Mass of the year.  I remember thinking real angels were singing in the choir above and I loved so very much the procession outside and being able to finally see the baby Jesus lying in His creche.  It was somber, beautiful, joyful and beyond words.

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Those mornings waking to see that Santa had passed and even if what wasn’t on my list was under the tree, I still adored it all.

I’ve never grown out of Christmas. ¬†Even though the early mornings are NOT my thing, I still muster up the strength to wake up and get ready to act happy as my children are when they see the gifts under the tree.

This year, for the first time, my son won’t be here. ¬†He’s with his dad this Christmas. ¬†His youngest sister opted out and the judge didn’t make her go, but my son did the right thing and took the bullet for her. ¬†I hope he has fun and I miss him more than I can write or express in speaking. ¬†Christmas won’t be the same without him here. ¬†But, I still love it.

I love how people are so much nicer when shopping or just out and about.  It reminds me that there is so much good-will in this world.  It reminds me to be a better me.

I love all the Christmas shows on TV.  How can you not???  I love them all.  The old, the beautiful, the cheesy, all of them remind me to smile.

I love decorating and sitting downstairs in the evenings just enjoying the lights and the quiet. ¬†It’s soothing and spiritual and special. ¬†There is nothing like it.

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I love shopping for trees. ¬†Even though I hate thinking of them chopped and lonely waiting for someone to buy them, I always wish they were still in a forest somewhere, but I still shop and look for and find and will ¬†patiently wait for the PERFECT tree. Like we did this year. ¬†My mom was in a ‘mood’, par and course for her lately, and wanted to leave because we had to wait for the poor overworked manager to help us, but I said, “NO! We’ve found the perfect tree and we’ll wait to take it home, end of story.” I apologized profusely to the manager and I said a prayer for him and his family. (Old age is never an excuse to be mean) imho ¬† ūüôā

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Here’s our tree and this year I decided to put only ornaments that were homemade, or significant. ¬†The special ones, no theme, no garland, just ornaments from all of the kids and me. ¬†I most love the paper and cut-out ones they made when they were so small. ¬†The ones with their pictures on them, the ones they balk at.¬†The dough star tied with yarn. Those make me smile most.

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I love that my crazy mother is giving my youngest daughter a kitten this year without asking me. ¬†I don’t mind, I adore kittens and my daughter has never really had a pet all her very own. ¬†This Christmas morning will be memorable indeed. ¬†ūüôā

I love how on Christmas Eve it’s a time to just stay home and hunker in. ¬†While the rest of the world shops last minute frantically, we can do nothing but enjoy Christmas music and hot chocolate on this year’s balmy day 0f 70 degrees. ¬†(the South never fails to be ¬†unseasonably warm inappropriately)

I just love Christmas and I always will.

I hope yours is the most beautiful, peace-filled, glorious one and that you receive all the joy and happiness you need.  God Bless you!

Love and Peace,

Niki ¬†ūüéĄ ūüíē

©justagirllost2


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FIX

image~

 

~

Only

you

are the Fix

to this addiction

I cannot

undo this spell

you’ve¬†wrapped

me in

Constantly

spoon feed me

pieces of you

inch by delicious

inch

or

I will die

of wanting

You

are my

every deadly sin

Divine intervention

my disturbing religion

Dominating affliction

You

always, you

~

©justagirllost2 

*photo mine


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I Cannot Bend to Love

I cannot bend to Love
if it entails chains

I cannot bow to lust
if it brings tears like rain

I can only give & take
without losing who I am
without stealing your fire or inner dreams

I think Love completes
and adds to those things we’ve hidden so well.

Love brings out our inner beast
The burdens you used to hold dear,

please, my dearest, share with me.
~

©justagirllost2 

 


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the Sky

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The worst part about these photographs is that you just had to be there.  In the moment, without the net of a camera lens.

It’s like the sky calls you to view her beauty and you stop and realize you have no perfect way to save the perfection of the moment, so you just click and hope it transcends from camera to eye. ¬†It won’t, but at least you tried.

I love the sky.

~